Sooo today was such a better day emotionally! I had a nervous breakdown yesterday when I got home. Aaron was ready to go on our date but I got in my pj's and sunk in the couch. Then we talked (well I yelled) and I got all my vents and frustrations out. *sigh* We did argue but then once I told him he NEEDS to be more understanding he stopped and I guess remembered what I am going through. He told ME to put myself in his shoes (putting up with ME) and I said WHOA! PUT YOURSELF IN MY SHOES BUDDY! I am shooting myself up daily, I am menopausal, I am on a HEAVY AF, I am cramping, I am having to pop 4 horsepills a day, I am about to start another shot, I am going to start getting the dildo camera up my hoohaa almost daily... I am just WEEKS away from ER and ET. I am STRESSED. NOW PUT YOURSELF IN MY SHOES... !!! WHAT DO YOU DO?? YOU GET TO HAVE AN ORGASM AND WATCH THE IVF SHOW! THAT'S IT!!!! WTH???
Well I guess that did the trick because he totally changed after that. He apologized and was sweet. I also told him "I am sorry for even saying this but I need to say it, but I feel that if I want to be a baby and whine and cry or get pissed, I have the right to. I feel this time should be ALL about me!!!" I know that sounds selfish but I feel like I freaking deserve it. I am in one of the most stressful times in my life right now and hell if I want to freak out I can and I WILL.
Soo to add on to the craziness we got our property taxes statement yesterday! OMG is all I can say. It about doubled PLUS more in the last year!!!! Yikes! Then our car needs some major fixing up. We had thought it would be around $1400 which we have $1200 now for that specific purpose but turns out NOPE, it needs more work! So our grand total is $2200! This is Christmas time. Grrr..So that I think that is what set me off yesterday. Aaron called me and was soo calm about the car thing that it bothered me a bit. Then he went to the freaking movies! Grrr... So I was bawling yesterday telling Aaron how maybe we shouldn't be doing IVF now because we are going to be poor. lol Aaron actually laughed at me. I am sure I looked silly. I remember saying "how will we have $$ for 2 cribs?? My poor babies" hehe At least I was being positive and optimistic! He told me we would be alright and then hugged me and that made me feel 100% better. How funny that security can make a girl calm down.
I told Aaron too, what are you going to do when I am PG or in menopause or when our teen daughters have their periods?? He freaks out and thinks I am from outspace or something when I am hormonal. It makes me mad! My dad had 3 daughters and when we would get our periods he would go get us our pads and some fruit cocktails. We LOVED that and he knew it would make us feel better. (I love my daddy) So Aaron freaking out is equivalent to being a selfish, cold hearted snake compared to my sweet daddy during my period. He has a rude awakening if he has some daughters PLUS me on the old AF. HA!

So just venting. I am excited for TOMORROW! Woohooo! I can't wait to see how my lining and my little ovaries look.